What is unseen.

Look around for a moment.

What do you see? What price would you put on it?

It baffles me that God calls us to "set our eyes on what is unseen and not what is seen". He calls us to go agianst the grain in a very revolutionary way. Honestly, you cant read that, and honestly say that you are following it without standing out in a croud. *** Oh, side note... Jesus is contravertial, revolutionary, and weird. Therefore, if you don't fit that definition, you might want to ask the Lord where he wants you to give another part of yourself to him.*** Not only does he tell us to focus on what is unseen though, he explains why (i do love it when he does that). Its because the unseen things are the things that are going to last for eternity! The city that is going to come at the end is going to be one with an eternal foundation. The things you see around you; money, cars, houses, buisnesses, hobbies, even the ocean and the sky, all these things will pass away, and if you are holding unto them and only them, you'll fall too. I'll fall too.


I am really asking God to show me what parts of the world I am holding onto too tightly, and what parts of eternity I am not holding onto tight enough. I do warn you though, only ask such questions if you are ready to deal with the answer (because he WILL give an answer).



Grace.

A look at the past...

These are entires I have written in previous years....

Right now...

Sorry, I kinda just want to go off about Ecc. 3:1, it has been a increadible verse for me in the past week or so. Lately I have been getting indescribably stressed with school, S.L.A.C. and the whole idea of my "future". Seriously, the classes I am taking now, effect the rest of my life! I'm ***16*** I dont want that kinda of responsibility! But here I am, grinning and baring it... ANYWAYS what I was saying... There is a tme for EVERYTHING, thats huge, think of the expanse of things that fit into "everything"... there is a time to go to school, to do homework, to relax, to hang out with friends, to be with family, to have friends, to be lonely, to have a boyfriend, to be single, to act like a kid, to grow up, to face the world head on, and of course, to run away and hide. I guess i am gonna get all odd and write a list of all the things i think right now is a time for (for me that is): a time to learn from every situation, a time to choose where I am going, a time to let go of somethings, a time to hold on to others, a time to experience unlimited possiblities, and a time to use my last grains of childhood. Alrighty so ignore the cheezyness of this, alright?


this is the link to a blog that I had before this one if you want to look at that.. jsut s you know


http://descendant.lifewithchrist.org/index.html

Dead lives.

I wait in longing for life to start. As if all time stands on the edge of a cliff, waiting to jump-- to fly. But somewhere, I lost life in the continual passing of seconds and minutes, days and weeks, months and years. A part of me felt incomplete. As if I had forgotten an essential organ somewhere, or perhaps, not forgotten. Rather, I never had it to start with. And then, for a season, this undefinable space was filled. Unfortunatly, in the process of filling of that part of myself, I lost everything else. Why I needed that part of me so terribly, to the point of sacrificing every other part of me, I do not know.
Then, the season ended, and once again I was alone. The hole inside me had become an open grave, just waiting to swallow me up. I tip toed my way around that grave for years. Sometimes I was ready to fall right in, but something held me back. (Thanks Lord).



But God does more than keep us from dying... he keeps us from living dead lives.



Living here, and living one, has made me an expert on dead lives. Every person I pass could easily be thrown into the box labelled "walking dead". Don't think of this as a judgement. I don't intend it to be at all, what I am saying is this: the lives that these people live contain no life. Part of me wants to join them in their pointless existance, but only when all things seem helpless. And in such times, I am still reminded, that though things SEEM helpless, they most definatly are not.
What I am trying to say is this: I am guilty of living a dead life. A friend presented this quote to me, "Is the life you are living worth Jesus dying for?" I would argue, that at this point... no. I'll let you know when that gets fixed.

City Lights...

The sunset was beautiful tonight. I have been terribly tired with all the coming and going lately, so I slept from 3 until 6:30 this evening, and woke up just in time to see the sunset; orange and pink swirls, twisting up from the jagged city sky line. Then you can see the lights. Every building overflows with light that shines out into the cold darkness. The thing is, you don't see the lights in the day time. The buildings can, depeding on one's opinion, look rather lovely during the day also, however, they are best gazed upon at night... when everything glows. This, truely is beautiful.
However. Over the weekend Jessica and I set up a prayer station on the beach, and were delighted to be able to use a handful of tiki tourches. A number of them were set up around the logs, where one of the main parts of the station was, but then one was set alone down by the water. Now, this was beyond beautiful... it was drawing.
What we were having the kids do was wash off their hands in the water. At first this seemed to be a simple task, but when the tide went out, leaving ankle deep mudd, I was forced to lead the groups across the rocky beach a ways. It was in that time that I truly realized the importance of light. It was in that time, and in this time of reflection that I now truly understand, that when there is no light, there is darkness.
Understand this: I am not saying that a light shawn amoung many lights is not useful, most definatly it is. What I am suggesting is this; that there are still places left in complete darkness. Christ calls us to be lights, and I believe we are so surrounded by light all the time, that we forget what it is like to walk in darkness. We forget what darkness is all together, and doing so, we forget to go out, and look for the dark places, into which we are called to bring light.

"When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." John 8:12

"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. 15Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house." Matthew 5:14-15


Grace,
Jordan

Something to say I suppose....

I'm not sure what I am going to blog about, I really am not sure. I wish I were back in Mr. Birds writing 12 class when I could write complete nonsense for a full 15 minutes without anything to get in my way... but alas...
I realized the other day that this really is my home for now... wow, what a revelation!!! I started franticaly cleaning things and putting pictures up etc. ha ha. I ever put my bright orange saraong (spelling?) on the side of the bunk bed to give me more privacy. Oh, and I put curtains up that my mom gave me when I was at home for thanksgiving. It feels strange to think that I have already been here a month, but stranger still to think I will be here for another 11 months!
But now, on a more serious level... we are looking at F/M texts in the bible (by that I mean parts that were written by males, and parts that were written by females). Its actually intensely interesting, and has caused me to look very differently at the role of women in the Bible. hmmm, this is an awful way of ending this, so please forgive me :)